... but it wasn't.
William is so cute. I told him at dinner I took a pregnancy test this morning. He was like... "and"...
I just laughed... I mean did he really think that he would be still in the dark if it was positive at dinner. I told him that I would have jumped on him this morning in bed. His response... "Don't do that, it could hurt our baby."
We talk about "our" baby... even refer to it/them by names. Yes, we decided on a few names that are definites. We have one girl name and one boy name. William says... what if we need two of each. I said... let's just hope for one right now.
So we have names but no baby. Some people might think that's unhealthy. I'm gonna go ahead and say it's hopeful. I'm still hopeful. And I love our baby. Or babies.
It's been almost a year. Part of me is happy it's taken this long. Then William was reluctant. Now William is excited. Then we still had 6 months of military training ahead of us. Now we only have a deployment. Then we were a little less rich. Now I've paid off a third of my loans and we have WELL over enough for a down payment saved up. Then I was a new grad. Now I have a year of work under my belt, my full license and I could work from home.
Crossing my fingers for my next cycle. Thank the Lord William is being put on a rig long term near our house!
Peyton
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
POAS disease
I am making an announcement... I have POAS disease.
This may or may not stand for "Peeing on a Stick" disease. It is a horrible affliction that causes you to jump out of bed and run to the bathroom at 6:30am so that you can "pee on a stick". It is mostly found in women who are terrified that they might be pregnant or in women who are hoping that they are pregnant. Both cases cause extreme anxiety and feverish sweats while the "lines" are developing. Side effects of POAS disease are cussing, excessive fluid intake, praying out loud loudly, keeping a cup on the back of your toilet at all times, and buying pregnancy tests in bulk off of amazon.
So there you have it folks... I'm on day 29 of my cycle and I have POAS. So far... all negative. I'm thinking it's safe to say at this point that it won't be changing. But I continue to engage in the POAS ritual with the hopes that two little lines appear instead of one. Oh how I would kill for two little lines.
Tuesday I'll return to the doctor for an ultrasound and a new plan. Either a pregnancy plan or a clomid plan.
Peyton
This may or may not stand for "Peeing on a Stick" disease. It is a horrible affliction that causes you to jump out of bed and run to the bathroom at 6:30am so that you can "pee on a stick". It is mostly found in women who are terrified that they might be pregnant or in women who are hoping that they are pregnant. Both cases cause extreme anxiety and feverish sweats while the "lines" are developing. Side effects of POAS disease are cussing, excessive fluid intake, praying out loud loudly, keeping a cup on the back of your toilet at all times, and buying pregnancy tests in bulk off of amazon.
So there you have it folks... I'm on day 29 of my cycle and I have POAS. So far... all negative. I'm thinking it's safe to say at this point that it won't be changing. But I continue to engage in the POAS ritual with the hopes that two little lines appear instead of one. Oh how I would kill for two little lines.
Tuesday I'll return to the doctor for an ultrasound and a new plan. Either a pregnancy plan or a clomid plan.
Peyton
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
My turn?
Just found out that the girl I know at work that referred me to my new doctor got pregnant on her last IUI cycle. I have again, mixed emotions. I'm glad that she is pregnant and glad that this means my doctor must be doing something right... but...
Every single pregnancy I hear about makes me wish it was me.
Over the past few weeks William has turned nto the best support system. And for this I am so grateful!
Peyton
Every single pregnancy I hear about makes me wish it was me.
Over the past few weeks William has turned nto the best support system. And for this I am so grateful!
Peyton
Monday, May 9, 2011
Yesterday
Yesterday a sweet person told me they were thinking about me. It made my day.
Yesterday as my husband held me in bed, I cried. It was such a happy cry. I cried because he told me how badly he wants a baby. Such sweet music to my ears.
Yesterday I thanked God profusely for giving me such an amazing man.
Today I can't get yesterday out of my head.
Peyton
Yesterday as my husband held me in bed, I cried. It was such a happy cry. I cried because he told me how badly he wants a baby. Such sweet music to my ears.
Yesterday I thanked God profusely for giving me such an amazing man.
Today I can't get yesterday out of my head.
Peyton
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
New Plan... again...
I'm on Day 14 right now... so we wait (and keep trying) until I get to about day 35 or 40. If I spontaneously start my period I will start the below plan. If I don't I will go in for the sonogram and possibly use Prometrium to start my period.
Day 1, 2, or 3: Sonogram
Day 3-7: Clomid (or possibly Femara)
Day 8- ovulation: Estrogen patch
Change estrogen patch every 3 days
Day 10: start using Ovulation Predictor Kits
Day 11: Abstain
Day 12: Sonogram
Day 12-20: try, try, try!
Day 21: Progesterone test
Day 28 to 35 Pregnancy Test
If this doesn't work this round, then we will try IUI.
Which is generally the same with some added sonograms and also a shot involved.
From there... we get one more shot at an IUI cycle and then it's on to the Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) for a HMG (Human Menopausal Gonadotropin) cycle which basically involves a lot of the above aspects in greater dosages and injected into my butt repeatedly over the cycle. Sounds like fun right?
I sure hope something works soon. The waiting is going to kill me!
Peyton
Day 1, 2, or 3: Sonogram
Day 3-7: Clomid (or possibly Femara)
Day 8- ovulation: Estrogen patch
Change estrogen patch every 3 days
Day 10: start using Ovulation Predictor Kits
Day 11: Abstain
Day 12: Sonogram
Day 12-20: try, try, try!
Day 21: Progesterone test
Day 28 to 35 Pregnancy Test
If this doesn't work this round, then we will try IUI.
Which is generally the same with some added sonograms and also a shot involved.
From there... we get one more shot at an IUI cycle and then it's on to the Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) for a HMG (Human Menopausal Gonadotropin) cycle which basically involves a lot of the above aspects in greater dosages and injected into my butt repeatedly over the cycle. Sounds like fun right?
I sure hope something works soon. The waiting is going to kill me!
Peyton
Monday, May 2, 2011
More Good News
William went to the specialist today. Apparently his shape thing isn't a problem. Because apparently he has so many little swimmers (a very large number of them) that having a few that are the wrong shape is no big deal. The doctor was completely unconcerned.
So I guess that's good. The only thing I'm "sad" about is that William and I were having a good time sharing the burden. Or I was enjoying not being the "problem". And I was also enjoying my very special treatment. William has been treating me like a princess. Which I love. Duh.
He promises to continue treating me like a princess. Swears that it wasn't because he felt bad. We will see. He bought a new TV to celebrate I think. He also showed me his A+ report card from the sperm analysis. Oh gosh. I now have a husband who knows how high his sperm count is. This could be dangerous.
We see my doctor again tomorrow. I'll report back then. Until then we will continue to happily enjoy the process of trying... and neither of us are afraid to admit that has been the best part. Although we will both admit that we have never been more in sync and felt closer than we have over the past couple of months.
I'm starting to feel calmer... that's a good thing.
Peyton
So I guess that's good. The only thing I'm "sad" about is that William and I were having a good time sharing the burden. Or I was enjoying not being the "problem". And I was also enjoying my very special treatment. William has been treating me like a princess. Which I love. Duh.
He promises to continue treating me like a princess. Swears that it wasn't because he felt bad. We will see. He bought a new TV to celebrate I think. He also showed me his A+ report card from the sperm analysis. Oh gosh. I now have a husband who knows how high his sperm count is. This could be dangerous.
We see my doctor again tomorrow. I'll report back then. Until then we will continue to happily enjoy the process of trying... and neither of us are afraid to admit that has been the best part. Although we will both admit that we have never been more in sync and felt closer than we have over the past couple of months.
I'm starting to feel calmer... that's a good thing.
Peyton
Monday, April 25, 2011
What the Heck?
Seriously....
I just got my day three lab results and they were normal. I guess that's good? Although now I'm thoroughly confused about what might be causing my issues.
I want to be done with this. I think we are both really at peace and okay with adoption, but we don't want to end up pregnant and in the middle of an adoption (although we both agreed we would continue to go through with the adoption regardless). It's funny to be seriously talking about things like the race of our baby and open adoptions and ages we would be okay with. We even discussed adopting from the state system and looked at sibling groups. We agreed they would have to be young children like under 5... but we are pretty open to anything I think.
William won't admit it to others quite yet... but it's extremely clear that he wants a baby now. He even mentioned to his supervisor that he is trying to "settle down". So cute.
He went back to work today. He wasn't thrilled but I made him aware that I am extremely grateful for him providing for our family. Hopefully some new job opportunities will open up soon. We keep trying and trying. We are so ready.
I just got my day three lab results and they were normal. I guess that's good? Although now I'm thoroughly confused about what might be causing my issues.
I want to be done with this. I think we are both really at peace and okay with adoption, but we don't want to end up pregnant and in the middle of an adoption (although we both agreed we would continue to go through with the adoption regardless). It's funny to be seriously talking about things like the race of our baby and open adoptions and ages we would be okay with. We even discussed adopting from the state system and looked at sibling groups. We agreed they would have to be young children like under 5... but we are pretty open to anything I think.
William won't admit it to others quite yet... but it's extremely clear that he wants a baby now. He even mentioned to his supervisor that he is trying to "settle down". So cute.
He went back to work today. He wasn't thrilled but I made him aware that I am extremely grateful for him providing for our family. Hopefully some new job opportunities will open up soon. We keep trying and trying. We are so ready.
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